I'm only using ml with my son but don't know what to do when he interacts with other kids... Should I talk with them in majority language but translate everything in minority language? (Feels heavy and artificial.) I have also tried to just keep using minority language with everyone when I know the other parent doesn't mind. But as they get older, we won't have a rich role playing game if the other child doesn't understand me... Or do I just use majority language with everyone?
When I am outdoors in ML or ml1 country I speak ml2 to my daughters if I am addressing them directly. However, if I am talking to them and the other child I speak in ML/ml1. I never translate. As you put it, it feels heavy and artificial.
If I had the chance to have a little ml2 speaker playing with my daughters, I'd have a different approach and I wouldn't hesitate and speak in ml2 to them.
The reason I always go for the community language is simply so as not to make the other child uneasy (some could simply run off if they aren't used to a foreign language) and embarrass my child by feeling different. Young children hate being different from other kids so I wouldn't want to make my daughter feel uneasy about being bilingual by inflicting our ml on a ML kid and making them run off.
With a ml2 I'd have a different approach, I'd speak in ml2 so they would feel they have something special in common.
***"Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars" - Oscar Wilde***
I'm in the fortunate position that half the kids in my daughter's year (2 classes) at school are either bilingual French-English or French-German (our ml, French being the ML). Some are even trilingual with yet another language spoken at home. As a result, all the kids are used to part of the parents speaking something other than French with our kids. (Makes things easier as compared to the days when my daughter was in ML preschool.) What I usually do is that I speak ml with my daughter and ML with the other kids (unless of course they are bilingual with our ml), and sometimes I'll repeat in ml, like "Don't go behind those bushes" in ML to all, and then in ml to my daughter "Got it? I don't want you to go behind those bushes."
However, my daughter just made friends with a ML kid in our apartment complex. (We moved there not long ago.) I might have to recalibrate my approach there, but so far he's only asked what language we're speaking.
Wait and see, I guess. I'll follow this thread to see what other zookeepers suggest.
If I am addressing my kids directly then I stick to ml. If I feel that my son is feeling awkward or that I might be rude then I say it first in ML then say it again in ml or vice versa depending on who is involved in the conversation. It feels heavy and artificial at times BUT, to me, that is better than compromising my ml. However, it always feels very awkward speaking ml in public. I get looks from other people all the time. I have now developed thicker skin than at the beginning and it is becoming more natural but I am still very aware of the awkwardness.
I speak ml in public. I find it especially helpful in crowded spaces like the playground because she can easily distinguish what I'm saying from the cacophony of other parents. However, if say, a child comes up to us and starts a conversation - asking about a toy she has or what not - I will speak to her in ML because the conversation at hand is in ML. I do the same occasionally in the presence of my husband who does not speak ml. If we're all at the dinner table we're all speaking ML because otherwise he wouldn't be able to follow along in the conversation. In other instances, like the three of us are out and about and I am speaking directly to my daughter, I'll use ml. My 2-year-old seems to have mastered code switching in so far as she will speak to me in ml and to my husband in ML BUT, will respond to me in ML when I address her in ML and in ml when I address her in it.
We live in a diverse city with lots of other bilingual families so she's always hearing other people speak in different languages and we've yet to encounter parents or children that are opposed to the idea. The children sometimes come up to me and ask me what language I'm speaking to her but that's about it.
Mayken: Two playdates with classmates from my 7-year-olds ml class this weekend, and the kids and parents all spoke ml the entire time! ml interaction with other kids is precious during summer holidays. Very happy
Jul 26, 2017 0:04:20 GMT 9
Mayken: Holidays! Just the 3 of us, in ML country this year, but I'm planning for a lot of ml time, without any family to visit and friends to meet (our program when we're in ml country).
Jul 29, 2017 5:02:56 GMT 9
Amy: Caught my eldest bragging to her cousin she could speak ml2 and asked him in ml2 if they could continue playing in this language....could it be my daughter is slowly accepting the fact she's bilingual and happy to be so...??
Jul 31, 2017 5:07:41 GMT 9
Mayken: Not all fun after all - we were at a castle today with an amazing 3h treasure hunt, but it was all in ML. My daughter did lots of ML reading (clues), but no chance of slipping ml in.
Aug 1, 2017 4:13:44 GMT 9
Mayken: Welcome back, Adam! We kept the zoo running while you were away and even swept up the monkey droppings!
Aug 2, 2017 18:26:12 GMT 9
Adam Beck: Well done, Mayken! Many thanks! (I was afraid I would be overwhelmed by the monkey droppings.)
Aug 3, 2017 6:18:08 GMT 9
Amy: My turn to disappear for a few weeks! Off to ml1 country with very high expectations as to the benefits of ml1 family bonding and ml1 exposure for my 2 girls! Have a lovely month of August everybody ! xxx
Aug 6, 2017 4:58:35 GMT 9
Adam Beck: Amy, have a really fun and fruitful time!
Aug 6, 2017 6:30:06 GMT 9
Nellie: Welcome back Adam and have a great time Amy!
Aug 9, 2017 5:37:45 GMT 9
Ahmet: Hey Adam! Thank you very much for writing such a nice book. I've read it , took lots and lots of notes. It's full of precious information about raising a bilingual kid. It helped me a lot and still keeps me on my way. goo.gl/photos/oPyfKffApeWPB9eU
Aug 11, 2017 7:34:44 GMT 9
Adam Beck: Ahmet, I loved seeing this photo of my book! Thanks so much! Would you mind if I shared it? And I'd be really grateful if you would leave a review at Amazon or elsewhere online.
Aug 11, 2017 8:54:39 GMT 9
Ahmet: Hi Adam, of course you may share the photo. By the way I already left a review at Goodreads and Amazon and I will continue to share info about your book.
Aug 13, 2017 17:34:53 GMT 9
Adam Beck: Ahmet, thanks a lot for your support!
Aug 13, 2017 18:14:01 GMT 9